Tuesday, September 04, 2007

Seminar Brain Fart

So I was drifting between reality and fantasy during the weekly SNRE seminar, which was surprisingly good for a non-biophysical or simulation modelling talk. I realized why they call the coffee concoction I took as a precaution "Eye Opener". It's not so much of true mental alertness as the agony of a full bladder about 15 minutes into the darned 50 minute torture session and not being able to leave in case something I have to write down comes up (ie, attendance sheet and speaker evaluation forms). Just imagine, a 600 mL capacity bladder is at 595 mL and they're still in the middle of the talk... then in a need to remove more water from the bloodstream, the bladder grows to inhuman sizes and the sensation of my internal organs floating in a solution of urea, followed gradually by my eyeballs being submerged in that yellow solution. And then just as explosion seems to be inevitable, I either bolt out the door to the nearest water closet during the lengthy Q&A session or the session finally finishes completely and I can finally escape without doing the sprint of embarrassment.

I think I'm going to stick with something a bit less powerful than "Eye Opener" unless it's a known snoozer topic for me that I actually have to be awake for. Only one more semester of these weekly torture sessions!

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